情人间的潜台词

今天Jane给我发了一封标题为“Hahaha”的邮件,摘录了些情人间的潜台词(原出处不详)。我看完后忍俊不禁,特翻译转贴如下:

情人们,你真的听懂了对方在说什么吗?有些时候潜台词和字面的意思正相反……

Yes = No.

是=不是。

No = Yes.

不是=是。

Maybe = No.

也许=不是。

I’m sorry = You’ll be sorry.

对不起=你才该道歉。

We need = I want.

我们要=我要。

It’s your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now.

这是你的决定=很明显,事到如今这才是最佳方案。

Do what you want = You’ll pay for this later.

做你想做的=之后你会为此付出代价的。

We need to talk = I need to complain.

我们谈一谈吧=我要抱怨下。

Sure go ahead = I don’t want you to.

大胆往前走=我可不想你去。

I’m not upset = Of course I’m upset, you moron!

我没有生气=我当然生气了,你这个笨蛋!

You’re so manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot.

你真有男人味=你该刮胡子了,还有你这身臭汗。

You’re certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?

你今晚真专注=你满脑子都是性吗?

Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs.

关上灯浪漫些=我的大腿松垮跨的。

This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house.

这个厨房真不方便=我要间新房。

I want new curtains = and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper.

我要新窗帘=还有新地毯、家具和墙纸。

Hang the picture there = NO, I mean hang it there!

把画挂在那里=不,我的意思是挂那儿!

I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep.

我听到一些声音=我发现你快睡着了。

Do you love me? = I’m going to ask for something expensive.

你爱我吗?=我想你买给我些贵东西。

How much do you love me? = I did something today you’re really not going to like.

你有多爱我?=今天我做了件你很讨厌的事。

I’ll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV.

我一会儿就好=脱掉你的鞋,看看有什么好的电视节目。

Is my butt fat? = Tell me I’m beautiful.(but is the bottom, you also can call it ban.)

我屁股大吗?=说我很漂亮(这样说是最起码的,你也可奉它为旨。)

You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me.

你必须要学下如何沟通=你只要照我说的做

Are you listening to me!? = Too late, you’re dead.

你在听我说吗!?=太晚了,你死定了。

Was that the baby? = Why don’t you get out of bed ([俚]清早一起就发脾气, 急躁不愉快, 心绪不好)and walk him until he goes to sleep.

他是个孩子?=你为什么不从早到晚对他发脾气?

I’m not yelling! = Yes I am yelling because I think this is important.

我没有嚷嚷=是的,我在嚷嚷,因为我觉得这很重要。

The same old thing = Nothing.

还是老问题=没事。

Nothing = Everything.

没什么=所有

Everything = My PMS is acting up.

所有事=我来月经了。

Nothing, really = It’s just that you’re such an asshole

真的,没事=你真他妈的是个杂种。
 

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